ISSA - International Slalom Skateboarding Association

Jose's response (oops, I mean Joe's) That doesn't label me as a racist,does it? This is a great forum to vent/bicker/call-out and lastely have fun!! w/o cluttering up the other threads w dribble and spit. In this time of year (goin' into single digits tonite) after spring like 60's skiing, the keyboarding is going to be likely. Like it, or leave it! Arab and I had words, I and mine were threatened, I didn't like that but didn't lose sleep over it!! ENJOY, we're all good peoples here
Oh Brady and Vlad..I busted your password ...Youre secret's safe w/ me!
Dave G

Busted? Just now? Dude, you're fast!

It was easy..just my reaction time was delayed!
Did you get squared away w/ Red Bull?
As my 9th grade Russian teacher repeatidly said...(translation) keep your tongue behind your teeth!!
pronounced Ya Zeek Za Zu Balmy... heh heh

I`m done with this! I F#&$!% SWEAR!

Brady, I have a dress you can wear when you race Slappy, so that way when you lose, at least it will be funny.

haha

Rumor has it H.J is only riding his closet of the summer fashions! It's time to re-wardrobe for a new look to match the black pumps and feaux sable stole!

nevermind.....

I was happy as a clam to see those pics of JC posted, didn't care who did what with 'em. I was so happy I invented a new move at the skatepark on the 1st annual Day After Christmas Where's Patio? Old Skool session. It's called the "frontside Johnny Cash". I wish I had a picture of me doing it to post here. Naturally it led to other "Johnny Cash" variations, including my favorite, the "double Johnny Cash" cess slide.

In other news....if there's gonna be a race between Brady and Slappy, I wanna see it. Don't care when or where, I wanna see it. I got $10 that says neither one can make the course doing the "Johnny Cash" the whole way down...

Sorry, but everything after the original usage of the Johnny Cash photo is just lame.

It was placed as a full page ad in Billboard magazine in 1998 by his label after winning a Grammy. It 'thanked' the Nashville industry and country radio for their support.

http://www.johnnycash.com/billboard.htm

I'm actually partial to disco moves when skating.

Not to be nit-picky or anything, but Billboard 1998 was hardly the first use of that image.

Funny you mention disco dancing, my wife accused me of looking like I was dancing when she saw a video of me slaloming (yeah, a dancing bear maybe).

Geez Joe, you're all fired up lately. What's the deal?
Been practicing?
Got cabin fever?
Who's Fred Schneider?

Somebody race Joe for gods sake.
If not, i'll do it.

P.S. I'm with you, Tony Alvarez. As are most I would bet.

Given that Troy never posts while being sober, and it’s 10 AM, ahh…Troy… heh-heh-heh…it’s 10 AM.

$200 on Slappy (and you, Sir Slappy, will come out and practice!)

PS. I'm with you, Mr. Slappy. As are most I would bet.... $200.

Who's Fred Schneider?

Lead singer, B-52's

Q

It's noon somewhere.

Hey Joe:

I am ready to race you at any of this season's events I attend.

We can make it a US versus Canada race - case of Molson's Canadian versus a case of Ommegang or Bud (your choice)

Knowing that we both turn 40 this year - the trophy can be a bottle of Geritol.

Big Joe are you game?????

Rob

Joe:

I just wanted to talk a little smack and get us both going.

Today it is -16 degress F out and everything is frozen solid!!!!!

But to get both of us going and not watching those strange TV programs, let's go fo it - we will work out the specific terms and which event with you as spring comes.

All the best,

Rob

Sounds fun Joe, but don't bet on me being faster than anyone. Getting older and fatter by the minute. Oh and it's not the racing that sounds fun it's all that talk of beer!

Has anyone worked out a good method of handicapping?

(I need all the help I can get.)

The F/S race sounds good. I dunno yet if we will make da Farm, but we live 10 minutes from TG, so that event is pretty doable for us.

Q

Vlad Popov wrote: $200 on Slappy (and you, Sir Slappy, will come out and practice!)

PS. I'm with you, Mr. Slappy. As are most I would bet.... $200.

Now I'm confused. Practice to race Bradyscabs won't be necessary.

Practice drinking beer? Everybody needs that practice!

I've seen the guy. He does everything fast.

The Gathering 04, what a great thought.

I would consider going if I could accomplish at least 4 of the 5 below...

1. Somebody would babysit me (let me sleep over)
2. If JG and I could go at least 130mph in his Mercedes
3. Race against Adam Nathanson
4. Have a smoke with GBJ
5. Talk Tortoise with Brady

Number 2 is must.

Joe, I'd love to race you at the Gathering if I end up going. Unfortunately there isn't going to be much in the budget for travelling this year...my wife and I are about to start the process of adopting a baby and I'm gonna need every penny I can get for that. But if I make it, I'll race you...one condition...loser has to sing karaoke "Love Shack" with a painted-on pencil moustache. Ouch. If not this year, there's always '05...

Speaking of Fred Schneider, I have one dream if I ever win the lottery...hire Devo and the B-52s to play a concert at my house, and Mr. Schneider will have to get up and sing "Whip It" with Devo. I've always wanted to hear that, and if I won the lottery I'd pay whatever it takes to make it happen.

Funny how things come `round in circles?

I was just talking with my buddy today who had 2 red heads and recently lost one. The 2nd one started acting weird so he went a got a star to keep him company.....for the next 80 yrs.

Jus wondering how big a pen is needed for a giant?

Now Chuck, if only that rabbit would die....
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What kind of race talk is this?????

Just had this idea...

Wouldn't it be good starting a new darkside topic for every year like...

"Darkside of the cone 2004"
"Darkside of the cone 2005" a.s.o.

That way we can start from scratch every year and let "old dark matter" go to the history books to give place for new "fresh dark matter". Also keeps the topic in a reasonable size.

As I said, just a thought. I don't feel I am the one to start it up myself. I prefer being on the bright side of the cone. I mean, who wants to have his name on the "Darkside of the cone 2004" topic for a whole year?

Who has the guts? Who will take the burden off "Terence Kirby"?

...are you suggesting that Tyler Dar.., ahmm, Terence Kirby is weak? That we need to "take this burdon" off of him?

Hmm...

This is the real thing right here.

Tony Alvarez, looks like you used "his" name. You know, the erection guy. I second the motion made by RL.
Yer outta here!

Only kidding, you know! That was in reference to his chasing people away.

.......

Ric you need to stop checking out the young women and watch your child.



This is too funny!
Child Gets Stuck in Stuffed Animal Game Machine

What the hell are Piggly Wiggly's doing up in WI? I thought they were just a southern thing?

Joe, watch out for 2004. I have gotten exceptionally faster, just ask Rick Ick. Maybe we could race for... I dunno... the dress has been done, what else could we do? What about like a cyber slalom/beer pong combo? Actually that would be bad, you would win. Come up with something man, I tired of trying to think of ways to publicly embarrass myself.

.......

Joe,
Tonite is a special night for me and my family. You know, with my wife being chinese and all.

I plan on going to a real chinese restaurant and eat a 13 course dinner. And I`m not talking moo goo gai pan. I`m talking seperate courses of fish, scallops, lobster, beef, pork, chicken, squab, tofu, vegtables, hot and sour soup, birds nest soup (yep, real sparrow nests in the soup from the high moutain caves of se asia) and probably end with the ceremonial lychees.

This restaurant also has dragon dances and fireworks.

So it`s not about WHO FLUNG POO.

Year of the Monkey is considered a lucky year. Hopefully you won`t wear your luck out,,,heh heh.

Oh, and screw Henry, I`ll buy you all the beer pong hits (whatever they are?) we each can handle, racing or not....

Ric,
now who are these women that need spanking?? I hope their over the age of 18.
Somewhere in this big post theres someone that has 2 redheads??

I love redheads, they like to get a little freeeeeeky

thats just my imput

Oh sorry, A little Bobby Sherman. Why in gods name do I remember that song?
Anyhow Barry, The Young naughty girl from the real world MTV lives near me. Yes she's over 18 and yes she needs disipline. Do Mormon wifes like that sort of thing?

Anyone care to emulate this stance?



Man, talk about getting all of the front truck! It would be interesting to find out if this really works on a classic long, wide open downhill La Costa style giant slalom. Or, if maybe he had some sort of back-foot action going where he brought the foot back and forth on the deck as he went down the course?

I can't for the life of my figure out how anyone could maintain this stance through any serious offsets without the back truck sliding all over the place. This has to be a capture in time that was just after and just before he moved his feet.

I wonder, though, how many kids out there killed themselves after looking at this pic and said to themselves, "well, if that's the way it's done then that's the way I'll ride too!" After all, if we saw it in SKATEBOARDER on Tuesday we were trying to do it on Wednesday.

I keep reading all these threads about decks, flex, shapes, spacers, grommets, bushings, axles, hangars, wheels, hubs, bearings, nuts, bolts and Slappy Maxwell and I have to admit it makes me chuckle a little bit.

Sure, I enjoy talking about stuff like I'm a wrenchhead and pretending I know what Geezer is saying when he starts going off on metal elasticity and the fatigue factors involved in maximum turning angles. It's fun.

BUT ITS NOT A SUBSTITUTE FOR SKATING! I don't want to sound like a broken record, but I'll repeat something here I've said in other places under different circumstances: until the time comes when you are missing the podium by 1/1000th of a second and your winnings are $500 instead of $750, then don't sweat all this equipment nonsense. It don't really matter.

Trucks, wheels and boards allow you do to more but they do not make you a better skater. Only practice, conditioning and hard work will take you to the top and keep you there. If you believe that you'll all of a sudden get into the Final Eight as soon as you give McCree $175 for a Radikal, then I got a Bridge in Brooklyn I'd love to tell you about. I've even got a color brochure with all the details.

Recently, several skaters have gone on and on about spacers and their affect on wheels and performance (and whether or not they are even necessary.) Sure was fun to read. Guess what? The whole argument MIGHT affect one slalom skater out of a thousand's level of performance on the hill.

Trust me when I say this: get a board, get some markers and go skate. That's the one mitigating factor that will take you to the top quicker than anything else. Don't think you have to spend a lot of money, don't fret over machine tolerances and please dear God in heaven don't quibble over ABEC ratings. It ain't gonne make that much difference.

Has anyone bothered to read some of the stuff I've been posting from the old SKATEABOARDERS? Well, there is one lesson to be learned above all others in what Henry Hester, Curtis Hesselgrave and others said 25 years ago that's still true today. NOWHERE in any of those Skate Tip articles will you find the following sentence:

"Now, as soon as you upgrade to more expensive equipment, then your performance will dramatically increase if you follow these helpful tips."

That ain't the way it works. Improve your performance physically and mentally and then sweat the very, very small stuff.

Leave the wheels and bearing expose's to the keyboard racers who really have no other outlet for their slalom skating frustrations.

Wes, nice post...too nice in fact for this forum. You could have at least named some names of the keyboard racers and insulted them. When did you get so soft.... See you at the races, TK

PS... Wes Tucker actually races

TK,

Check my new year's resolutions in the Down South Forum. My new attitude towards those who irk me will be made more than apparent.

P.S. So far in 2004, I've raced at more events that TK, Gilmour and Twayzer COMBINED.

Eeeewww, there's a nasty thought: TK, Tway and Gilmour combined.

Jack Smith wrote: A Bahne Black Hill is on it's way to Donald at this very moment. This board is being sent to him free of charge for his evaluation. I am looking forward to his review.

And once again free stuff goes out . . . and PADan Mitchell doesn't get a damned thing!

I'm tellin' 'ya, there's no justice!

YEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAWWWW!

Darkside of the cone is back on the air.

PA Dan should get his sponsor, Joe Camel, to send him some flow.

Who is this guy in Germany? Props to Jack for putting his board where his mouth is, but it doesn't seem cricket, does it Wesley?

Other thoughts;

* I plan to humiliate the Massachusets contingent this weekend. I apologize in advance.

* Henry J, bright star of the freshman class of Carnegie Mellonhead University can't pass a driving test, so can never meet up because his parents are tired of driving him around in their Benzes. Dude, I'll trade you a moped for your Her Vaughnster.

* I went to see the movie "Troy" last weekend. Surprisingly it's some kind of blood and sandal epic. I thought it was going to be about a misanthropic former Long Island slalomer. Actually, that's not a bad idea for an Indy film, somebody call Hays for financing. I understand Steve Buscemi is interested in the part. Gilmour is playing his former self.

* Madonna has changed her name to Esther. Da Farm has changed its name to The Farm. Coincidence? Will we race around big silver cone like brassiers? Truth or Dare around the fire. Just how much of a Ommegang bottle can 66 fit in his mouth?

* And Wesley, The Members Only Club closed it's doors last week. Please turn in your jacket.

Just trying to restore DSOTC to it's former glory

Joe

Joe Iacovelli wrote:And Wesley, The Members Only Club closed it's doors last week. Please turn in your jacket.

Joe

Actually, Joe, they just moved to a new location. They really got tired of your pathetic self standing around in the lobby begging for a guest pass to the bar.

By the by, I see your new movie, JOE NOBODY, is showing at the local Drive-Out.

All my love and best wishes to Nicky and the Missus,

Wesley

Joe, I forgot to mention this to you last time, but you are looking mighty trim these days. However, I think the young'ns in MA are bit beyond your abilities. So, if humiliation is in your game plan I hope you don't mean through the cones.

The man gets in shape, competes in Paris and WHAMMO, he's got an ego.

BTW, did Henry fail another driving test, or are you referring to the last test he took? Hmmm. Henry, it's summer. The bumper cars should be open....go practice.

See ya around.

Joe, why are you assuming I cant skate with you? I haven't talked to you in months... just call sometime 203 376 6751... and I'm tired of being knocked for having willing parents who are perfectly alright with taking me to skate... it's usually me driving and them shotgunanyways... 203 376 6751 tough guy.

And where was everyone for the July 4th race?

Henry Julier wrote:And where was everyone for the July 4th race?

Henry, sorry if my bumper car joke was offensive.

We had company July 4, and by the time I got downtown, everyone was gone. BUMMER.

Matt,

You are banned from DSOTC for 10 days. No APOLOGIZING on DSOTC.

Anger is an energy.

Joe

Joe,

I'm sorry you feel that way.

Joe Iacovelli wrote:Matt,

You are banned from DSOTC for 10 days. No APOLOGIZING on DSOTC.

Anger is an energy.

Joe

Joe,

Anger is an energy. But my therapist says that I need to apologize to everyone who I think I've offended in the last 30 days. It's been a daunting task, but I'm almost done.

Ya big jerk!!

oh, sorry Joe!

Hey, Joe,

I'm really sorry about that "big buffoon" thing in my private message to you.

I understand you're not that big anymore?

All you Sallys bring your shit to the one and only FARM 04 race Aug 7th in Bethal CT . Joe found the hill so this is his local spot. Come kick his ass if you can. Who will beat wes E? Who will beat Wes T? Will KMG smoke you all???? Who will sing with the band Sat night ? Sign up now at the evil sister site.

What happened to "Giving the People What they Want"?

Two out of three Farmers prefer a 2-day event over other formats. Especially when Saturday is on Shady lane and Sunday is on Derby hill.

Is the one-day format someone's insurance of not being smoked two days in a row? :0

Wes you guessed it. I was all for the 2 day event. Tway shot the Idea down because he was afraid of having to race you BOTH SAT and SUNDAY!!!
Tway does not like losing to Wes E. Period.

That said, can we count on you to help out cone marshalling this year?