Southern Culture On The Skids

Slalom Skateboarding in the Southeastern U.S.A

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Wesley Tucker
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Post by Wesley Tucker » Mon Apr 02, 2007 7:36 pm

Let's all go to the Jaw Ja State Fair:

http://emuse.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/17815

I mean, just how nauseatingly redneck can you get?
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Dave Gale
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Post by Dave Gale » Tue Apr 03, 2007 1:43 am

What has 400 legs and 8 teeth?
The waiting line at the Belgian Waffle stand at the Jaw Ja. State Fair.
ENJOY!! (while you can)

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Post by Wesley Tucker » Sun Apr 29, 2007 4:32 am

HER DIARY :

Tonight, I thought he was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at a bar to have a drink. I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment on it.

Conversation wasn’t flowing, so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed, but he didn’t say much. I asked him what was wrong; he said, “Nothing.” I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said he wasn’t upset, that it had nothing to do with me, and not to worry about it.

On the way home, I told him that I loved him. He smiled slightly, and kept driving. I can’t explain his behavior. I don’t know why he didn’t say, “I love you, too.”

When we got home, I felt as if I had lost him completely, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there quietly, and watched TV. He continued to seem distant and absent.

Finally, with silence all around us, I decided to go to bed. About 15 minutes later, he came to bed. To my surprise, he responded to my caress, and we made love. But I still felt that he was distracted, and his thoughts were somewhere else.

He fell asleep - I cried. I don’t know what to do. I’m almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else. My life is a disaster.

VLAD's DIARY:

Lost to Ohm again, but at least I got lucky.
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Wesley Tucker
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Post by Wesley Tucker » Sat Jul 07, 2007 11:47 pm

What this guy said:

http://www.gobacktoohio.com/
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Dave Gale
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Post by Dave Gale » Sun Jul 08, 2007 2:32 am

The difference 'tween a "Yankee" and a "Damn Yankee" is, a "Yankee" ventures south..spends a little time and a lot of money and leaves..a "Damn Yankee" ventures south spends time and money ...and stays!
ENJOY!! (while you can)

Eric Brammer
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Yanks

Post by Eric Brammer » Sun Jul 08, 2007 4:41 am

To an European a Yankee is an American; To an American, a Yankee is a Northerner; To a Northern born American, a Yankee is from New England; To a New Englander, a Yankee is a Vermonter; To a Vermonter, a Yankee is someone who puts Jam on their pancakes instead of maple syrup....

This why the statement 'Yankee Go Home' dosen't make a hoot of sense in these parts! ;-)
"Surfin' these Old Hills since back in The Day"

Dave Gale
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Post by Dave Gale » Sun Jul 08, 2007 4:46 am

I agree! The term "Yankee Go Home" doesn't make any sense! hee hee he!
ENJOY!! (while you can)

Wesley Tucker
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Post by Wesley Tucker » Thu Jul 12, 2007 4:07 pm

The National Transportation Safety Board recently divulged they had covertly funded a project with the U.S. auto makers for the past five years, whereby the auto makers were installing black box voice recorders in four-wheel drive pickup trucks and SUV’s in an effort to determine, in fatal accidents, the circumstances in the last 15 seconds before the crash.

They were surprised to find in 45 of the 50 states the recorded last words of drivers in 61.2 percent of fatal crashes were, “Oh, $hit!!”

Only the states of Tennessee, West Virginia, Alabama, Louisiana and Mississippi were different, where 89.3 percent of the final words were: “Hold my beer, I’m gonna try somethin’.”
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Wesley Tucker
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Post by Wesley Tucker » Thu Jul 12, 2007 4:09 pm

The Montana State Department of Fish and Wildlife is advising golfers to take extra precautions:

Be on the alert for bears while playing on Gallatin, Helena, and Lewis and Clark National Forests Golf Courses.

They advise golfers to wear noise-producing devices such as little bells on their clothing to alert, but not to startle the bears unexpectedly.

They also advice you to carry pepper spray in the case of an encounter with a bear.

It is also a good idea to watch for signs of bear activity. Golfers should be able to recognize the difference between black bear and grizzly bear droppings on the golf course.

Black bear droppings are smaller and contain berries and possibly squirrel fur. Grizzly bear droppings have bells in them and smell like pepper spray.
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Rick Floyd
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Re: Yanks

Post by Rick Floyd » Thu Jul 12, 2007 6:43 pm

Eric Brammer wrote:To an European a Yankee is an American; To an American, a Yankee is a Northerner; To a Northern born American, a Yankee is from New England; To a New Englander, a Yankee is a Vermonter; To a Vermonter, a Yankee is someone who puts Jam on their pancakes instead of maple syrup....

This why the statement 'Yankee Go Home' dosen't make a hoot of sense in these parts! ;-)
To a Norther Vermonter (me), AKA Southern Canada, a Yankee is a baseball fan from New York.

Then there's the distinction between the "Yanker" and the "Yankee"........

Wesley - funny stuff!!
"All the money in the world can not buy sharing the excitement of life with other people. Nothing else matters."

- Jason Mitchell (Criddlezine Interview)

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Post by Wesley Tucker » Fri Jul 13, 2007 3:07 pm

When Tommy Bowden died he went to heaven where he was met by God at the gates. God said to Tommy, you have been a good son who put up with alot over the years, welcome to my kingdom.

God tells Tommy, "I know the temptation to cheat at Klempsun is very strong, afterall I do remember their *national championship* that was paid in cash. The preasure on you to win was intense, yet you tried to do things the right way while you were there and sufferd through 8 win season after 8 win season. For all your trouble and honesty I would like to reward with a house here."

There in front of them was a nice little house with a small, worn, and faded Klempsun flag in the window. Tommy said thank-you God but can I ask you one question? God said, sure. Tommy looked at the huge house that was right beside his. It was white, trimmed in garnet and black, there were Gamecock stickers in every window, a massive Carolina flag flew in the front yard, there were Gamecock stepping stones that led to the house and the Carolina fight song blaired out continuously over the loud speaker.

Tommy said, "why does Steve Spurrier get such a nice house?"

God replied, "oh thats not Steve’s house, thats mine."
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Post by Rick Floyd » Fri Jul 13, 2007 5:07 pm

We have the same joke up here but it is Peyton Manning that is going into heaven - and Peyton thinks the nice house is Tom Brady's...well, at least before LAST year! :-)
"All the money in the world can not buy sharing the excitement of life with other people. Nothing else matters."

- Jason Mitchell (Criddlezine Interview)

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Post by Wesley Tucker » Fri Jul 13, 2007 5:46 pm

Rick Floyd wrote:We have the same joke up here but it is Peyton Manning that is going into heaven - and Peyton thinks the nice house is Tom Brady's...well, at least before LAST year! :-)
The difference being mine WASN'T a joke.
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Rick Floyd
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Post by Rick Floyd » Fri Jul 13, 2007 6:24 pm

When I eventually get up there I'll be looking for the big guy with the COCKS cap on!
"All the money in the world can not buy sharing the excitement of life with other people. Nothing else matters."

- Jason Mitchell (Criddlezine Interview)

Wesley Tucker
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Post by Wesley Tucker » Sun Jul 29, 2007 3:53 am

A little politics for a hot, sultry, rainy summer day:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xyUX6wV1lBQ
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Wesley Tucker
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Post by Wesley Tucker » Thu Aug 09, 2007 7:37 pm

If anyone is interested, we FINALLY found out what happened to Shirley after WHAT'S HAPPENING?

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Paul Graf
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The skid has now come to a stop

Post by Paul Graf » Mon Aug 27, 2007 4:32 pm

Miss Teen USA South Carolina says it all...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WALIARHHLII

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Post by Chris Favero » Tue Aug 28, 2007 8:02 am

classic.nothing aint never gonna happen like that in the US of Illinois.
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Wesley Tucker
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Post by Wesley Tucker » Sun Sep 09, 2007 3:54 pm

Ah, it's a beautiful morning.

The air smells sweeter, the birds are singing more lustfully and all is right with the world.

Strange.

I sent an e-mail last night to all my buds in Jaw Ja.

Haven't gotten any answers yet.

Oh, well.

Life is good.
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Marty Schaub
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Who Cares?

Post by Marty Schaub » Sun Sep 09, 2007 4:16 pm

Just because one lives in JoJa please don't assume that this means I bleed Bulldog red like most of the state. Having grown up in California I am Pac-10 ALL the way. Every team that played yesterday in the P10 won. My USC gets to whoop up the Cornhuskers next week too.

Life is good at # 1......
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Wesley Tucker
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Post by Wesley Tucker » Sun Sep 09, 2007 4:59 pm

What are all these strange words of which you use?

"Pac 10?"
"P10?"
"Cornhuskers?"

I made no reference to such things. Just that it's a beautiful day.

You obviously have some sort of one-tracked mind leading you in strange and unfathomable directions.
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Wesley Tucker
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Post by Wesley Tucker » Mon Sep 10, 2007 12:51 am

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Jonathan Harms
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Post by Jonathan Harms » Mon Sep 10, 2007 6:31 pm

Um, you mean like the 289 million U.S. residents who don't live in either Jaw Ja or South Cackalacka (and because we don't have maps, don't know where either one is)? :-)

Tom Thompson
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Post by Tom Thompson » Tue Sep 11, 2007 12:30 am

WT, how did I know that was coming? :)

GT's gotta beat somebody before I'll join in.....BC Saturday night!

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Wesley Tucker
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Post by Wesley Tucker » Tue Sep 11, 2007 3:59 am

Jonathan Harms wrote:Um, you mean like the 289 million U.S. residents who don't live in either Jaw Ja or South Cackalacka (and because we don't have maps, don't know where either one is)? :-)
I refer you to the comments I made to the gentleman some moments ago:

http://www.slalomskateboarder.com/phpBB ... 28&start=0
Wesley Tucker wrote:This is the Down South forum. Those of you from San Diego looking for some local info, sorry, wrong South. Before things get carried away around here, let me lay down a few parameters that will make the Down South forum a little different:

1. We will on occasion discuss collegiate football. Now, you might ask, "what does college football have to do with slalom skateboarding?" Well, if you asked that question, then it's obvious you ain't from around here. To put it simply, let's just say that collegiate football has something to do with EVERYTHING. Therefore, around here it's always appropriate.
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Wesley Tucker
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Post by Wesley Tucker » Tue Sep 11, 2007 4:15 am

Tom,

Did you see this?

http://www.onlineathens.com/multimedia/ ... st_TF.html

That's one of the sideline guys. We still haven't heard what he did.
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Wesley Tucker
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Post by Wesley Tucker » Wed Sep 12, 2007 1:18 am

And the hits just keep on comin':

http://www.corelogics.com/sos/sosbeating.html
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Post by Wesley Tucker » Tue Sep 18, 2007 1:45 am

This Video was played on the Jumbotron at the Stadium before Kickoff this past Saturday:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WwW3ROEIiVk&eurl=
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Marty Schaub
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Strange?

Post by Marty Schaub » Sun Sep 23, 2007 2:09 pm

I guess that the air is not so sweet, nor are the birds in such full lusty voice this morning. And I percieve all is not right in the world either?

Just checking since USC laid 47 points on the Cougars. No. 1 is as No. 1 does.......
La Costa Boy For Life

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It will be worse, EH!

Post by Claude Regnier » Sun Sep 23, 2007 9:29 pm

If you think the southern culture has skidded wait till the World leaves Statesville. It will never be the same again.




EH!
Many Happy Pumps!

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Post by thomas edenton » Sun Sep 30, 2007 1:00 am

A very good football day, today. The USC pulls a win over yet another team that likes bulldogs and, as if that isn't enough, those upstate teat-yankers get a whuppin' down in Hotlanta. Life is good.

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Post by Wesley Tucker » Mon Oct 01, 2007 5:40 pm

Hollien REALLY appreciated the "WAR EAGLE!" I kept yelling in his ear all day Sunday!
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Post by Tom Thompson » Sat Oct 06, 2007 12:40 am

Well well Mr. Tucker, I would imagine your smiling right now....enjoy while you can! The Cocks appear to be the real deal....

I should be smiling too. It's always a good day when Clemson loses, especially to Georgia Tech!....But with Tech being the predictably(is that a word?) unpredictable team they've been for the past ten years, I'm preparing myself for a disappointing loss at the hands of Maryland this weekend, haha

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Post by Wesley Tucker » Sun Oct 07, 2007 3:39 pm

King o' Jaw Ja,

I am livin' large and in charge!

We go to beat the Tar Holes this weekend in Chapel Hill, then home for Vandy. After that it's a cakewalk through Tennessee, Are Kansas and Florida.

Man, did you see that mess last night from the Dead Gulch in Pickens County? Mike Patrick summed it up best: "Thunder and Lightning have become Mild to Partly Cloudy!"

I had mixed feeling about the the Vols/Jaw Ja game. Is it possible for them both to LOSE? Oh, well. Jaw Ja is now gone from the SEC East race. That leaves beating Tennessee (assuming they stay 1-loss.) Then we have Florida at home. That'll be fun.

Yes, it's been just a FABULOUS weekend!

P.S. Can you believe it? SOUTH FLORIDA is going to be ranked 30 spots AHEAD of Klempsun. Whadda' wonderful world it can be!
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Re: Strange?

Post by Wesley Tucker » Sun Oct 07, 2007 7:52 pm

Marty Schaub wrote:My USC gets to whoop up the Cornhuskers next week too.

Life is good at # 1......
Marty Schaub wrote:Just checking since USC laid 47 points on the Cougars. No. 1 is as No. 1 does.......
chirp . . . chirp . . . chirp . . .
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Dave Gale
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Post by Dave Gale » Sun Oct 07, 2007 11:25 pm

I'm happy to report that I took Senator James DeMint down the Gauley river today, and after pickin' his S.C ass out of the drink in Class V+ Pillow Rock rapid, I proceeded to "spank" him(literally) And said, keep your butt in the boat old man!! he was a nice gentleman, with a good sense of humor! And took one pretty nasty swim!!!! LOL
ENJOY!! (while you can)

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Post by Wesley Tucker » Wed Oct 10, 2007 8:02 pm

Q: What do you call a Tar Hole with two brain cells?
A: Pregnant.

Q. What is the only sign of intelligent life in Chapel Hill?
A: Duke University: 12 miles ahead.

Q: Whats the difference between the Dean Dome and a Porcupine?
A: A porcupine has 30,000 p r i c k s on the outside.

Q: Why doesn’t the UNC football program have a website?
A: They cant put up three W’s in a row!!!

Q: How many Tar Holes does it take to fix a flat tire?
A: Two, one to hold the six pack and one to call Daddy.

Q: How do Not Carolina graduates change a lightbulb?
A: They hold it over their head and wait for the Universe to revolve around them.

Q: Why do Tar Hole women always wear blue?
A: So nobody notices their vericose veins.

Q: What is Not Carolina’s fight song?
A: Nobody knows. It’s only played after touchdowns.

Q: When did Not Carolina become known as a basketball school?
A: Right after Lee Dedmon graduated.

Q: Why won’t Not Carolina play Carolina in Charlotte?
A: Well, they might be dumb but nobody ever said they were STUPID.

Q: Why is it so windy on the Outer Banks?
A: Because UNC sucks so much!
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Wesley Tucker
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Post by Wesley Tucker » Sat Nov 17, 2007 5:44 am

Just in case The King Of Jaw Ja checks in sometime soon:

Summerville won their playoff game tonight SEVENTY EIGHT to 47.

The quarterback (who's committed to the 'Cocks) threw NINE touchdown passes.

That's impressive at any level.
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Post by Wesley Tucker » Sun Nov 18, 2007 4:31 pm

Boston is a wonderful city.
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Post by Wesley Tucker » Sun Nov 18, 2007 4:54 pm

I FINALLY get to watch the Green Bay Packers play football today.

The best team in the NFL and they've been on in the Charleston market ONCE this year and that was a Monday night game.

All we get now are the sorry Panthers losing another one at home or Atlanta stinkin' it up against another lousy NFC South team.

Today, for a change, real football from the frozen tundra of Lambeau Field.

It's a great day to be an American.

Oh, you might ask: why is the game on today? Because the Pack is playing the lousy stinkin' Panthers.
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Post by Tom Thompson » Tue Nov 20, 2007 7:15 pm

Hey Wes, how we doin?

Dublin's still in the picture. They eeked out a win in their first playoff game. They're not as dominant as last year but are finding ways to win(9-2 overall/6-0 region).

Don't forget about the Cowboys & Pats!

Now....I'm still waiting to hear WHY Joey Harrington didn't get the start against the Bucs....WTF!.....I thought he was playing pretty solid. Especially for a QB with a weak line.

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Post by Wesley Tucker » Tue Nov 20, 2007 11:42 pm

Just for you Tom:

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Marty Schaub
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House divided

Post by Marty Schaub » Sun Dec 02, 2007 2:45 pm

I always have chuckled at those "House Divided" license plates. Ga & GT, Clemson, Auburn, whatever.

Now it looks like Georgia might play USC in the Rose Bowl. Gawd this is gonna be fun.
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rose

Post by Mike Ohm » Sun Dec 02, 2007 4:14 pm

Marty, I don't think so. How bout them Buckeye's!!!!!!!!!!
Damn Skippy

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Post by Dave Gale » Sun Dec 02, 2007 4:17 pm

Mike... You never doubted did you?
ENJOY!! (while you can)

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Buckeyes?

Post by Marty Schaub » Sun Dec 02, 2007 11:16 pm

According to all the crap I could read this morning, strength of schedule in thier two losses sucks so the Dogs will not play #1. The early line was Dogs to the Rose Bowl, now talk has them playing HAWAII(?) in New Orleans.

Oh well Fox will clear it up in a couple of hours.

Mike's a Buckeye? By birth or diploma?
La Costa Boy For Life

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Post by Dave Gale » Sun Dec 02, 2007 11:32 pm

We both from the hood! So is Geo and Mollica..No matter what Geo claims now, we're all Buckeyes!
ENJOY!! (while you can)

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OH10

Post by Mike Ohm » Mon Dec 03, 2007 2:31 am

Marty, my mistake, Ohio State is going to the Championship game and we are playing LSU.
Yep, born in Ohio, started skating in 75, went to school with Gale and started skating with Kenny, GEO and Dave around the same time. We met Kenny and Geo at the LeSport Skateboard team tryouts. We spent summers going to inner city librarys doing demos for the kids. Funny, Dave Gale set up cones and went Piercy on everyone. Kenny, Geo and I went the Dogtown route.
Damn Skippy

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Post by Dave Gale » Mon Dec 03, 2007 2:40 am

What a year for upsets huh? WVU looked like crap w/o Patrick White. I wanted OSU to play WVU so I could have it both ways! Oh, and instigating chaos with a bunch of WV rednecks is fun too!
ENJOY!! (while you can)

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Post by Jonathan Harms » Mon Dec 03, 2007 5:09 am

LSU in the champeenship game? Ain't that about a b*tch! Ohio State deserves it--I guess--but two-loss LSU? Hell, they got progressively worse as the year went on, and they BARELY beat Tennessee last night. I fart in their general direction... :-(

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